New England Patriots

The team that single-handedly ruins football. They always have a positive record. They always win their division. They always make the playoffs. They've won a buttload of Super Bowls. But it's never enough for them. They always, ALWAYS have to keep winning. And they always win under some bullshit circumstances, like the refs making a call in their favor or Tom Brady suddenly becoming god for 2 minutes, or the other team magically forgetting how to play. They win and win and win, and it pretty much just kills everyone's expectations. As long as they exist, there's no need to even get one's hopes up for an exciting season of NFL.